two from the two year old

Last week in Gus's classroom ...

Miss Rosemary: Kids, I don't like whining.

Gus: My daddy likes wine.

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Today in Gus's classroom, while Gus was having a diaper change ...

Miss Rosemary: I'm going to put some Vaseline on you.

Gus: Okay, but I don't know if my daddy wants you to put gasoline on my bottom.