Or thinking about writing my column.
Or offering myself tender words of encouragement, like "Hey, you talentless piece of shit, think you'll ever write anything funny again? NO? Me neither."
And then I cry.
So, this month, while I was basking in the self-love, the Morning Monologues were born. Some of you have written to say how much you like the video format, others have tortured me with your stony silence politely declined to comment, and still others have said "the videos are cool, but don't toss your keyboard" which I have no intention of doing.
I am pleased and delighted to announce that Blabbermouse is the proud recipient of the first-ever Epiphany Award, launched by the ever-fabulous Nancy of Fear & Parenting in Las Vegas. Nancy created the Epiphany Awards to honor funny but relatively unknown bloggers who average 20 comments per post or less.
That would be me. (In the "or less" category.)
While I could not travel to Las Vegas to accept my award in person, I could not allow the opportunity to make a speech pass me by.
And thank YOU, Internet, for keeping your comments to yourselves all these years! Just think what would have happened if more than 20 of you left comments on a post, or worse, SHARED THIS WEB SITE WITH A FRIEND.
No Epiphany Badge for me, that's what!
P.S. I did eventually write the column. The February issue is out in the pink bins ... And also posted online at www.hernashville.com.