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11/9/2009

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Have you had ample opportunity to soak in the Halloween photos from the last post? Do you need another week? I know some of the images are intellectually and philosophically challenging (Are they cookies? Are they art?) Just remember. Learning is a journey, not a destination. Take your time.

You're good? 
Alright then. Moving on to the next discussion topic. This one is entitled "Dark Chocolate: I Know You Love it, But To Me It Tastes Like Pan Seared Diarrhea."

Truly. I'm not just saying that for effect. Given the choice between dark chocolate and no chocolate, I'll take a rich creamy bar of NOTHING any day of the week. Thank you and pass the Symphony bars.

I am so sick of the rampant chocolate snobbery in this country. Everywhere I go, people are all, "You prefer milk chocolate? Eww, not me. If I'm going to eat chocolate, I'm going to eat the GOOD stuff." 

I'd like to see what they do to a Snickers bar when the cameras aren't rolling.

And yet they behave as if I'm some kind of Cacao Neanderthal.

(Which they no doubt pronounce Neander-Tall, because that's how CULTURED DARK CHOCOLATE CACAO LOVERS DO IT. And don't get all up in my business about how Neander-Tall is the PROPER pronunciation, unless you are also willing to admit that your strong suit is called your FORTE and not your FOR-TAY. What? You knew that, but you continue to pronounce it For-tay because EVERYONE ELSE DOES? Hmm, that's kind of how I feel about NEANDER-THHHHHALS.Thhhhhhhh.)

I remind myself of Richard Gere in Pretty Woman. "My therapist says I'm very ANGRY."

Here you can read about a few other things that annoy me (since you brought it up).

And to that list I would like to add #11: The fact that the only person who commented on that list did so to lament my loathing of dark chocolate*.

(*Though I still think you're swell, Margie.)

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    yours. truly.

    Amanda O'Brien is the author and sole proprietress of Blabbermouse, a blog she launched in February of 2005.

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