Have you tasted the new Pepperidge Farm Goldfish crackers?
You should know that they are FLAVOR BLASTED with Xtra cheese.
Also, they smile.
This morning, in an act of sheer desperation, I attempted to hide the carton. From myself.
Every day after I take Gus home from school, I reach for a piece of fruit and somehow end up with my fist submerged in a bowl of these satanic crackers. How exactly this happens is a mystery.
I sit next to Gus on the couch while he does his 20 minutes of reading, and before he's finished the title page, I'm bounding across the living room for a refill. By page five, the bowl is in the sink and I'm wearing the carton like a hockey helmet.
NO HANDS!
I don't even chew. I just open my mouth and let the Goldfish fall in. Like a whale. Or a vacuum cleaner.
When the carton would not fit in my secret hiding place this morning, I decided to try a softer approach. To leave myself a friendly reminder that I deserve better.
That I am an intelligent woman.
Capable of making healthy choices.
You should know that they are FLAVOR BLASTED with Xtra cheese.
Also, they smile.
This morning, in an act of sheer desperation, I attempted to hide the carton. From myself.
Every day after I take Gus home from school, I reach for a piece of fruit and somehow end up with my fist submerged in a bowl of these satanic crackers. How exactly this happens is a mystery.
I sit next to Gus on the couch while he does his 20 minutes of reading, and before he's finished the title page, I'm bounding across the living room for a refill. By page five, the bowl is in the sink and I'm wearing the carton like a hockey helmet.
NO HANDS!
I don't even chew. I just open my mouth and let the Goldfish fall in. Like a whale. Or a vacuum cleaner.
When the carton would not fit in my secret hiding place this morning, I decided to try a softer approach. To leave myself a friendly reminder that I deserve better.
That I am an intelligent woman.
Capable of making healthy choices.
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