Me: How can people say figure skating's not a sport?
Larry: Well, why do you think it's a sport?
Me: Wait. Why do you think it's NOT a sport?
Larry: Well, for one thing, there's no ball.
Me: Oh, nice, so what about skiing? Skiing is not a sport?
Larry: Skiing is most definitely a sport.
Me: (Waiting to hear more)
Larry: Although, you are right. There is no ball in skiing.
Me: (Waiting to hear more)
Larry: But there is speed!
Me: Speed equals sport?
Larry: Yes. Speed and balls.
Me: So the fact that figure skating requires tremendous skill, training and athleticism ... that counts for nothing?
Larry: Well, I mean, you throw around the term athleticism, but really, figure skating is just dancing.
Me: Right.
Larry: But on skates! Which I'm sure is really hard!
Me: Right.
Larry: Honey, no one ever said dancing on skates isn't hard.