I can't tell you how often I get invitations like this. Mainly because the word OFTEN does not apply. Words like "NEVER" and "VERY VERY SELDOM" and "WHAT THE? DO YOU THINK SHE GOT THE WRONG BLABBERMOUSE?" come to mind, but not "OFTEN." So naturally, I jumped at the invitation. I might have even pranced a little, I don't remember.
(Larry has just confirmed: I did prance.)
When I arrived, Ellen and Gabrael, two chic (and nice!) stylists from the super hip Nashville celebrity salon Trim were on hand to take our hair from bland (in my case) to beautiful.
THIS is my story.
(Cue sad violiny bad-before-hair music)It's true. My hair is basically an enervated foster pet that lolls around my head not doing much. It doesn't bounce. It doesn't swing. It doesn't like loud noises or to be scratched behind its ears. It's tame; I'll give it that. But the charm ends there.
BEFORE (my hair in its natural habitat):
So let me back up for a second.
Did I mention I went to Vanderbilt University?
Did I mention I went to Vanderbilt back in the day when women still wore cocktail dresses and high heels and felt compelled to have a date to attend Saturday football games? Did I mention that many of my classmates still hot rolled their hair every weekday morning before attending classes? Did I mention that I CRIED during practice*rush rounds because BIG HOT ROLLED HAIR + ADULT WOMEN SINGING + ENERGETIC CLAPPING + DELTA! DELTA! DELTA! = GAHHH WHERE AM I AND WHY ARE THE EXITS NOT CLEARLY MARKED LIKE THE WAY THEY DO THEM ON AIRPLANES!?
*Yes. I did say practice rush rounds. Because apparently joining a sorority is an artform so complex and difficult, you actually have topractice in order to get it right.
So the big curly hair has connotations for me.
Not that there's anything wrong with curls!
Look at Angie Smith from Bring the Rain. She looks gorgeous in her curly Suaved-out tresses.
But for me and my above-the-shoulder locks? That's a bad Shirley Temple movie remake waiting to happen. A Little Princess I am not. So there I was, watching and waiting and racking my hair covered brain for other things I could ask the stylist to do without sounding high maintenance. Like, perhaps she could just brush my hair? Or put it in an interesting ponytail? Or we could sing I Got You Babe a Capella and call it an afternoon. I'm flexible! Just pleeez no curls.
Lucky for me, Kelly Hancock from Faithful Provisions went right before me, opting for a casual up-do AND giving me the courage to ask for something other than the curling iron.
The end result?
This happens to be exactly how I would fix my hair myself if I had three hands, fourteen fingers, and six-foot-long monkey arms.
And it looks like I have a lot of hair, no?
To think just over a year ago my hair was here:
In case you're wondering (gentlemen, I KNOW you were just ITCHING to ask!), despite the tousled nature of this 'do, the hair did hold up. As a matter of fact, it carried me late into a night-long jam session with friends. HAIR-CAM ACTION SHOT: